Recently I was asked by a sweet friend of mine, who I grew up with but we now live in different states, something to the effect of if my life is really as happy as it seems. She was referring to pictures and things I share online. I asked myself...is it as good as I portray it to be?? I assured her it isn't all roses over here. I know that 99 percent of the things I share online are good things. They are photos that make me smile, happy moments, the little and big events I want to remember and relive when I look at photos and read back on what happened at different stages of my life and the lives of my children. I appreciate that I can share and have loved ones celebrate life's little milestones with me. But like I said, it isn't all roses over here all the time. What I share on this blog, facebook, and instagram is only a sliver of our daily happenings. There are plenty of things in my life that I don't care to take the time to document and post. I prefer sharing and reading uplifting things, it's therapeutic and refreshing for me. I do not mean to portray a perfect life or a perfect marriage or perfect children. How is something "perfect" anyway? It's relative, right? I'm rambling now... I just want say that I stand by my little blog mantra, life is so, so sweet. But this little life of mine is so far from perfect...confession time:
// I'd say half of the time we go to the grocery store, a package of food is opened that kids and I snack on while we shop, and then I hand the cashier an empty package when I'm checking out.
// I have been struggling with being consistent in the way I discipline as a mother. Follow-through has never been my strong suit. My heart feels equally sad and frustrated as I think of how disobedient Brooks can be, especially when we're out and about, and I have a gut feeling it's because I haven't done a good job at teaching him to obey and that there are consequences when he doesn't. It's lazy parenting on my part, and so selfish.
// I'm late to everything.
// I have needy-wife syndrome...the kind that causes me to complain way too much to my poor husband for coming home late from work, when I absolutely know he's doing his best to get home as quick as possible.
// I love finding deals and sales, but I'm horrible at budgeting. Adam solely keeps track of all the finances and bills, and I've said for years that I want to help and make it a team effort, but I haven't done anything about it. (thank you, I'll accept my bad wife award now) Yea, not a fan of money.
// My kids rock. But they're both masters of throwing intense tantrums, of varying degrees depending on what they're going for.
// I don't shower daily. (um, yea. thank goodness for deodorant and dry shampoo)
// I have the sleeping habits of a teenager. I am such a night owl, and if I had it my way, I'd sleep in 'til 10:00am.
// With the amount, or lack thereof, of effort I put into keeping my house clean and orderly, I care way too much about what others think (which is LAME). And then all too often I become a giant stress ball when I know people are coming and, "We have to get the house clean!!" Sorry hubs. :(
// I can count on one hand the times I have been totally caught up on laundry since we've been married. There are always things that need to be washed or folded or hung or ironed. ALWAYS. Oh and ironing...yea, actually that doesn't really happen over here. Which leads me to my next one...
// There is a ever-changing pile of clean clothes in our bedroom that migrates from the floor to our bed and back to the floor daily. Well, most of them are clean. I think. Oops.
// I can dish sarcasm, but much too often I'm a poor sport when others give it to me.
// I'm terribly forgetful about calling/texting people back.
// I haven't been studying my scriptures daily like I know I should. Want to get better at that, and writing in my Gratitude Journal...it's been too long.
// A good, homemade dinner only happens a couple times a week. I thank my lucky stars for a man that eats whatever I cook, always says he loves it, and eats leftovers 2 days in a row.
// It's been a couple years that I've read a book for leisure, cover to cover.
// I'll stop there...
And here are some visuals...I took these pictures today (with the exception of the photo of the kids, I took that a couple weeks ago) to give a little perspective as to what it'd be like if you randomly dropped in to say hi...
But all of that being said. Life is good. It's just definitely full of messes, and tantrums, and arguments, and "I'm sorry"s, and kisses, and procrastination, and laughter. Thank goodness for that last one.
